wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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