Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
