I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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