when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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