I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize