Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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