i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
