Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
