He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
