i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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