Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
