You work out of a Hotel?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
he shaved USA in his pubs
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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