Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
smell my finger.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I just found a bag of teeth...
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
