There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
