At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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