He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
