bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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