Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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