Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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