Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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