there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
