Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
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worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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