similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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