This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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