Texts From Last Night

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  (716): View more from New York

  there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one

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  (716): there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one http://tfl.nu/1wzf
  Replies (3) Good night (1407) Bad night (438)
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  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet

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  (339): i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet http://tfl.nu/r3gc
  Replies (29) Good night (9905) Bad night (1553)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.

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  (205): I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030. http://tfl.nu/rrwq
  Replies (6) Good night (2530) Bad night (834)
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  (415): View more from California

  Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.

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  (415): Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time. http://tfl.nu/wfi0
  Replies (5) Good night (2104) Bad night (811)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.

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  (636): Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape. http://tfl.nu/3ikt
  Replies (3) Good night (1807) Bad night (897)
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  (518): View more from New York

  hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river

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  (518): hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river http://tfl.nu/791q
  Replies (12) Good night (2583) Bad night (743)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink

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  (406): Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink http://tfl.nu/w6xd
  Replies (5) Good night (1802) Bad night (634)
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  (415): View more from California

  I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.

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  (415): I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food. http://tfl.nu/ruld
  Replies (6) Good night (2167) Bad night (908)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(

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  (970): They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:( http://tfl.nu/8u7z
  Replies (12) Good night (424) Bad night (1371)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.

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  (719): She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment. http://tfl.nu/ge6f
  Replies (3) Good night (395) Bad night (663)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing

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  (403): the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing http://tfl.nu/cpea
  Replies (9) Good night (1384) Bad night (292)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  You should come by for the fire station blow job tour

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  (817): You should come by for the fire station blow job tour http://tfl.nu/ymfu
  Replies (3) Good night (775) Bad night (319)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown

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  (816): Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown http://tfl.nu/kwyi
  Replies (2) Good night (494) Bad night (247)
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  (818): View more from California

  Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport

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  (818): Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport http://tfl.nu/f771
  Replies (3) Good night (548) Bad night (193)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.

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  (770): Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes. http://tfl.nu/ubpd
  Replies (1) Good night (376) Bad night (379)

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