So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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