so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
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