i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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