it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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