I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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