Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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