It's like God shit irony all over that family
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
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