didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
