Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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