It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
we made out on top of his cat.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
