I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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