I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
In America we eat man semen.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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