your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
