yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
