Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
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