Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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