You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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