Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
