i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
