i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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