belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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