I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Randomize
