Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
