Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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