dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
This is my gift to your gina
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
