you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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