You're so nebulous sometimes
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize