I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize